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Morning Coffee: Go To College Paris - Jun 26, 2007 | 8:41:08
posted by: Josh
Paris Hilton left jail early this morning, meaning that newscasts will spend the next three weeks deciding whether or not she???s been reformed by the experience. I don???t think jail will make the difference for Paris, but I do have an idea ??? she should try becoming a student-athlete. I don???t mean joining a soccer team for an episode of The Simple Life, but four years of sweat, tears and hard work. It seems that Paris actually played a little ice hockey during her time in high school, so maybe we already have a fit. Of course, we don???t know if Paris legitimately has the talent to be an NCAA student-athlete, but I don???t have a problem with someone giving her a shot. There are some programs, especially in sports like rowing, swimming and diving and track and field, where there aren???t cuts. In fact, when I was playing baseball at Brandeis, our coach wouldn???t cut anybody. He may not have played you in a game for four years, but he wouldn???t tell you to leave the practice field. You could always work hard and get a shot to earn some playing time. Perhaps a slice of humble pie would be good for Paris ??? student-athletes don???t get things handed to them. It???s all about hard work. You all might think I am writing this tongue-in-cheek, but I assure you that???s not true. Go to college Paris Hilton. Go to breakfast, go to class, go to lunch, go to practice, go to the library, have some dinner, finish your studying, and if you have time for partying, good for you. You have four years of eligibility ??? why not give it a bid? 
Comments"Student-Athletes don't get things handed to them," really? I think they get a lot handed to them if you follow NCAA sports and a lot of the scandals that seem to take place regarding recruiting/competing in the higher profile sports. Also, Paris has tons of money, she doesn't need college. If she wants to learn, she should hire a tutor. It's too easy to get into college now as it is. Halls are flooded with idiots because schools value the dollar over education. Grade inflation manages to keep them all in school to keep the tuition rolling in. Half the kids in school now should have failed out long ago..... adding Paris to the mix won't help anybody. Hey Chris, not that I think you're a cynic, but why not add a line to every birth certificate? That line would read, "College degree from ______." Colleges would be entered on a rotating basis, so one infant might be a "Harvard" graduate, another a "Vanderbilt" graduate and so forth and so forth. That way everyone would be a college graduate while still in the incubator. Of course, you might not want a baby operating on you, or preparing your taxes or defending you in court, or writing absurd comments such as your, "Halls are flooded with idiots because schools value the dollar over education." Wow, no offense, but that may be the worst response I have ever read. I'm not even certain what point you???re trying to make with your comments on adding a line to a person's birth certificate. Furthermore, grade inflation is a problem. Perhaps not as much at private schools, but at most state institutions where grad students teach many of the classes it is a real problem. It's great that everyone can attend college now, but not everyone was meant to go. They should weed out the weak, not string them along so that the student can take out thousands in loans and add nothing to the classroom and in many cases little worth to their future. The institutions loaning money and the universities are the only ones who benefit from such practices.... It's not the end of the world, and it may not be the case for the majority of students, but it happens. Oh please. If Paris Hilton decided to go to a HUGE number of colleges, she'd not only be in, she'd be passing, and she'd be on whatever team she wanted (although she might not play). Chris, my suggestion was made to show just how inane your comments were. The comment stands! Larry, Also, the whole first half of your initial reply does not make sense. The relevance of adding a line to a person's birth certificate escapes me, you need to provide some context in your responses. For example, if I replied to your last post with something like this, it would seem rather silly and pointless: Hey, Larry, why don't we add a picture of a person's pet to their driver's license...etc... See? The thought of Paris Hilton playing hockey is hilarious to me. Agree with Pat, Paris would need to do some bulking up to play women's college hockey. Post a Comment |
  
It means that two very good teams with very good coaches made it to the final game.
- Marie
   
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As far as I know, Paris never enrolled in college, so she has all of her eligibility remaining. All we have to do is find a program that won???t mind a few extra reporters at practice, and we???re all set. I guarantee that Paris??? partying will take a back seat once she discovers the wonders of intercollegiate athletics. If she???s serious about taking a responsible stab at life, why not give college a legitimate shot? Education is a powerful thing.